Had another frustrating argument with Alena just now. The whole thing started last week when we were at the Kota Tinggi WaterFalls Resort, which ended with my sleeping outdoors for the entire night with lots of mosquitoes as my bed mates.
So here went the entire flow of the argument this night.
"Look I am the most annoying person on earth". I stated
"Yes you are." she affirmed what I said.
"Also, we only argue and fight when we are together" I continued my exposition
"Yes it is true too." She continued
"We are not happy together." I stated
She didn't reply to this.
"Since both of us are not happy together we should part. Since you do find me annoying why continue hanging around me and get annoyed. Shouldn't you be attempting to maximize your happinese? that is what the normal thing that all humans should do. Happinese maximization."
"Anyways, I don't like to spend time fighting and quarrelling. I seriously have better things to do with my life, like enjoying myself and relaxing by the beach. "
"You are so annoying. " She finally replied
"Yes, I am. So why are you even trying to keep me around? The natural thing to do is to leave me and get some peace for yourself elsewhere. Anyways didn't you tell me to get lost the other night? " I asked
"Well, I told you to get lost, but just temporarily." She declared.
"What crap is this? When I get lost, I will of course get lost forever. That is the most natural and consistant thing to do isn't it? "
"Why are you so annoying? "
"Look I am annoying, in fact I am the most annoying person on this entire Earth. And I don't want to annoy you any more. So why don't you just let me leave and you get someone else? There are tons of guys out there who would be willing to treat you better than I do. So why me? You're already working and should be getting your pay soon. You'll have your independence." I declared.
"Who on earth is like you. Are you crazy?" she screams
"Yes, I am and I am going to retire into monkhood in Thailand next year after Chinese New Year when things gets quiet over here. If you want to you can join me but only as a nun. "
"You are crazy! " she said frustrated.
"Yes I am, and being a normal and rational person you should leave. It is only for your own good. "
"No I won't. " she said
"Are you crazy too? Don't waste your time on a crazy person like me."
And the argument continues in circles. I can't seem to convince her that we'd both be happier apart.
What I truly want is just some peace and quiet. But here I am, stuck in this cycle.
Perhaps we both need to step back and think about what we really want from this relationship.