Summary: Difficult Conversations

Conversation Part 1: Focus on what happened

• start by talking from a keen observer’s perspective and then move on to exploring each other’s stories
• Don’t assume they meant it: disentangle intent from impact
• Focus on how we could rectify the error

Conversation Part 2: The feelings conversation

• Talk about the feelings and the actual sensation that is going on within both people
• Figure out how to manage each others’ feelings

Conversation Part 3: The identity conversation

• Keep your balance. Understand and explain that the implication of the conversation in no way detracts from your self-image.
• avoid having all or nothing identities, such identities are very fragile and prevents conducive acceptance of negative feedback